Stop Puking. Start Processing.
good news weekly 4.12.25
so many things happening in Spring …
marriage / relationship class —> Mondays in May (5,12,19) .. with childcare included
graduation sunday —> May 4 … we want to celebrate the 8th, 12th, and college grads
child dedications —> May 11
Stop Puking. Start Processing.
you know that thing where people go online and share their deepest pains or darkest secrets?
i think this secretly bothers almost everyone.
the problem isn’t opening your heart. it’s opening it too wide and to the wrong audience.
it’s puking your story instead of processing it.
"But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed." — Luke 5:16
"But Jesus on his part did not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people." — John 2:24
“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." — Proverbs 4:23
go with me …
urban designers often organize the world into four spaces:
• Public space — Open to everyone (parks, sidewalks, squares).
• Social space — Casual groups (cafes, lobbies, concerts).
• Personal space — Trusted circles (porches, small dinners).
• Private space — Just you and the few you deeply trust (homes, bedrooms).
In a healthy city—and in a healthy soul—these spaces have boundaries. You know what belongs where.
But here’s the problem:
Modern life hates boundaries.
Social media, shame, and a thirst for attention have trained entire generations to drag their private and personal lives straight into public. Victorian concepts of privacy have been demolished
We know that something’s wrong when we watch strangers overshare heartbreak, anger, or confusion to an invisible crowd. Some of us know the feeling of posting out of raw emotion, then regretting it an hour later. We ache for safe spaces to process... but instead, we perform.
Sociologists call this “context collapse,” we lose track of who we're talking to online.
What used to be private thoughts with close friends now become a public performance for strangers, coworkers, and enemies alike.
when we take what belongs in a personal or private space into public … we lose something important.
In short:
• We're posting prayers that were meant to be whispered.
• We're vomiting emotions that were meant to be processed in the quiet place.
Instead of processing in private, we’re puking in public.
Jesus Shows Us a Better Way
Jesus knew the pull of the crowd. He knew the temptation to constantly stay visible and accessible.
But look at what He chose:
"Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed." — Luke 5:16
He processed with the Father first—before teaching, healing, or debating.
He had personal moments with His disciples, social moments with communities, and public moments before crowds—but He fiercely guarded the private space where His heart stayed whole.
And when people praised Him or demanded more, Jesus didn’t open up His soul to everyone indiscriminately:
"But Jesus on his part did not entrust himself to them, because he knew all people." — John 2:24
Jesus loved the world, but He didn’t emotionally expose Himself to every person who wanted a piece of Him.
What about you?
Are you creating private spaces to process your heart with God?
Or are you rushing to puke your emotions into public spaces that can never heal you?
Proverbs 4:23 says:
"Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."
Guarding your heart doesn’t mean hiding.
It means moving with wisdom through the right spaces—private, personal, social, public—in the right ways, at the right times.
It means resisting the pressure to performatively puke what you were called to process.
About a year ago I bought a fiddle leaf plant. I’ve always envied my friends who can keep plants alive because I feel like I can’t keep them alive to save my life. So, when I found this fiddle leaf plant at Aldi for $15, I felt like it was cheap enough that if I killed it, I wouldn’t be too bothered. We started out well, but as the fall went on this plant looked as though it was going to shrivel up and die. I seriously contemplated throwing it out and throwing in the towel. But, I gave it one last chance after Christmas to somehow, someway come back to life. What would you know but that this fiddle plant is now flourishing and living its best life. It has new leaves sprouting forth, it’s green instead of brown and by the look of it, it exudes health.
I feel like often in different aspects in our life we start something hoping for automatic flourishment. For us to get good at something quickly or for a relationship to develop quicker than authentically possible and we are surprised when our expectations aren’t met. It’s easier to ‘throw in the towel’ than to keep trying or put forth continued effort when the results don’t seem to be what we hoped for.
Psalm one contrasts the way of the righteous and the way of the wicked. Verse three talks about the righteous person like this:, “He is like a tree planted by streams of water that yields its fruit in its season, and its leaf does not wither.” There are some plants and climates that allow for fruit to be born every season but one of the most amazing things I love about our climate here in Chicago is the drastic contrast of the winter to the spring to the summer. Some plants that are budding right now won’t bloom forth until later this summer. And even if a tree bears fruit all year round it has needs in order to keep producing.
When my plant wasn’t really looking good it caused me to give extra thought and attention. When my plant started to turn the corner there was some gratitude springing forth because I knew it was a beautiful turn around. When my plant started to flourish it made me consider my own life and how I want and hope to flourish in the same way. There will always be days when you want to throw in the figurative towel, but anything worth keeping and working at needs attention in order to yield what it’s supposed to.
This Saturday, I want to leave you a few verses to encourage your heart this week in case you’re feeling discouraged and like flourishing is impossible. May God’s Word give you a steadfastness that brings hope and faith that there’s more ahead.
Jeremiah 17:8-9 says, “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.”
Galatians 6:9 says, “And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.”
2 Corinthians 4:16 says, “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.”
John 15:5 says, “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”
Last Week’s Sermons
my buddy Nathan Finochio gave a super helpful Good Friday message on the two thieves called, two tickets to paradise
i preached on John’s miraculous faith at the empty tomb
Playlist:
every sunday … we will update the music from the previous Sunday on this playlist, hopefully helps you connect with things a little better.
Saturday Morning Book Review
glass jaw: a manifesto for defending fragile reputations in an age of instant scandal, by: eric dezenhall
another text book for my doctoral program (btw .. i thought going to Duke was going to mean winning championships, not stressing out while the team choked in the last minute), this book looks at how to navigate the ‘fiasco vortex,’ times when negativity in an organization or brand becomes self-perpuating.
Dezenhall a veteran of crisis management is brutally honest about the difficulties of the internet age and dishonest media, provides some helpful tips. this book is really helpful and aggressively de-mystifies the complexity of crisis communications.
this is good news,
luke + kristen